The Unfair and Radical Grace of Forgiveness and Its Impact

 

The word - forgiveness - stirs up various forms of reactions.  There are many thoughts, books, topics, etc about the subject of forgiveness.  I acknowledge there are nuances to this but in all of the dynamics and reactions, it is a command, a principle that Jesus talked about and lived out and we do well to pay attention to this unfair and radical grace.

It's a grace we all like to receive.  We want to be forgiven by someone.  We don't want others to hold our shortcomings, our mistakes, our failures against us.  We want redemption for ourselves. 

As we look at the parable of the unforgiving servant, we see how hard it is to give the same gift of grace to the very people we do life with.  We give judgement instead.

This story of the servant, in Matthew 18:21-35, who was forgiven his debt by the king, in return demanded another servant to pay all to him invites us to see what happens when we don't allow the grace of forgiveness to truly impact our own heart.  Jesus tells this parable in response to Peter's question of how often should we forgive a brother.

For those who may never have heard or read the story I invite you to read it for yourself and between you and God find your way in your own story of pain that you are walking through and through the release of making someone pay - find your own freedom.

There was a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants and discovered a man who owed an enormous debt of money, millions.  The man had no means with which to pay all that he owed and declared for more time to pay it all.  It says the lord or the king felt compassion.  In that compassion space, the king chose to release the servant from needing to pay.  

Oh, I can only imagine the relief and joy that the servant felt, but really, I wonder if he felt that at all.  Because it says that as he left he went out and found another servant who owed him money, not nearly as much as the debt that was just released for himself.  He demanded the fellow servant to pay all - NOW!   The man pleaded with him for more time to pay, but no, into prison he was put.

The king upon hearing of this treatment was upset and then handed the unforgiving servant over to authorities until payment should be made.

I am not going to tell you the how and when of forgiveness.  Each of our stories is a process.  

Maybe it will help to view forgiveness as a release.  It's a release of a debt that someone should pay.  We humans don't do well with doling out justice.  It so quickly and easily becomes about revenge and making the person pay.

To be honest, forgiveness, I don't completely understand with my human mind.  It feels like when I release the demand that justice be served I am letting someone off the hook and that feels unfair.  But then I remember how I like forgiveness and so - in reality - I am left off the hook and I appreciate that.  

I also am realizing that anytime Jesus tells us to do something and it doesn't make sense to me - then it must be the radical and upside down way of Jesus.  I am learning to trust Him and choose His ways.  They lead to life.

Forgiveness is releasing revenge.

Forgiveness is trusting God with justice.

Forgiveness is not demanding justice to be paid because far too often and usually justice is never enough.

Forgiveness is weeping with the injustice and pain of brokenness here on earth.

Forgiveness is holding out my hands to God - opening them up and releasing all that hurts to receive His radical grace of strength and grace to forgive.

Timothy Keller states that human forgiveness is completely dependent on divine forgiveness.  And I totally agree with that.  My own experience of grace impacting my heart deeper, influenced my thoughts toward others, which in turn, affected my actions.

I have said it before and will say it again, "You cannot give what you do not have.  You give what you hold inside."

To forgive in any way and to any extent, we must first experience His love and forgiveness that changes us.

If I have water in my bucket, water will come out.  If there is grape juice in my glass, grape juice I will drink. So, to echo what Timothy said is, yes, any amount of releasing and living out this unfair and radical grace, we must first of all experience it in our own hearts to be able to trust God with any outcomes.

I've had my own "Gethsemane " moments of wrestling to live God's ways.  The only way possible to love and forgive and offer grace is first of all to understand what Jesus has given us and to receive it with gratefulness. And then offer that to each other.

Forgiveness is the releasing of any 'debt' which breaks a link in the chains - most of all in our own lives.  We will either transform pain or transfer pain to others. 

Unforgiveness, holding on to justice before healing will transfer the pain.  

In a way that is mysterious to my human mind, forgiveness actually releases me to truly live - therefore transforming the pain.

Forgiveness is not overlooking something.  Actually in the story the judge named how much the servant owed him.  It's okay to say what hurt and what the wrong is.

Forgiveness is not saying it doesn't hurt anymore.  

Forgiveness is acknowledging the hurt but releasing the demand that the offender pay and turning my heart and mind to the truths of God.  He says, "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay" Hebrews 10:30.

Davey Blackburn when asked how he could forgive the ones who murdered his wife, he said that it was when he saw the offenders as humans, boys with stories.

Forgiveness can only take place when we allow ourselves to empathize (yes, I know... so unfair) for the one who hurt us.  When we can separate their actions from who they are - created beings by God, the same as me, loved with a purpose; compassion space is created.  Empathy is recognizing that "I too have wronged someone, somewhere, and sometime" and allowing that human piece to be a part of the picture.

Allowing compassion to enter our heart requires us to trust God for the justice due and realize what unfair and radical gift of forgiveness I too have received.  To see the one who hurt you as a human, as one who has value because they are created and loved by God, enables compassion to enter your heart.

This does not mean we ignore, brush over as if the pain doesn't matter, forgiveness actually names it but then releases it into the hands of Jesus for the truest form of justice.

Hurt people hurt people.  As Jesus spoke on the cross, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do".  

Forgiveness is actually more for ourselves than for the offender.  It releases us from the chain of what happened to move forward, heal, and live abundantly.

It is an unfair and radical grace that Jesus calls us live out.  It's one I like for myself and so I am required to pass it on.

The Radical and Foundational Workings of God's Love

 

I find it deeply weighty and hard to put into words the radical and upside down ways of God that Jesus lived, modeled, and called us to live out.  Maybe the reason it's so hard to wrap around with words is because they are so beyond our human comprehension and in all reality, don't make sense to this human way of thinking.

Why would anyone die for someone else let alone a sinner?  Underserving and unfair.

Why should we give to gain?  Ridiculous.  When I give I don't have it.

Why forgive the one who misused us, hurt us, and caused us pain of any sort?  Shouldn't that have justice and revenge?

I am left without words and yet, the work that God has done and continues to do in my own heart bear testimony that the radical love and grace to me - is life-changing and a work in progress (not a destination or attained, but attaining).

The one thing that surprised me the most was this very reality.  In my heart and mind I carried the injustices, the pain inflicted by people (which happens to all of us), health issues, and so on.  As I carried that, I also carried disappointments, revengeful thoughts of wanting others to hurt, I wanted life to be different.  One morning, in desperation as I cried out to God, the thought entered the chaos of pain - Is God a healer?  I responded with a yes.  Then if God is enough and a healer, then it can happen without anyone else doing 'the right thing' as I saw it.  

That morning began a journey of learning to know more of God as God invites us to in Matthew 11:29 - to learn of Me and I will give rest to your soul.

I also wondered that morning and in the days after, 'what is truth?'  I kept coming back to the words of God and so I chose them again and again, until one day I realized how deeply embedded in my heart they had become.

As I reflect back over the past six years the one thing that keeps coming to me is - God's love.  Ephesians 3:17 talks of being rooted and grounded in God's love.

I also realized how I started to see the world around me and the people in it, differently.  It changed the way I viewed situations and others.

Until God's love impacts our heart and becomes our foundation, we cannot truly love others.  As we receive God's love in the truest form of grace, then and then only will it change our interactions and enable us to give love, mercy, grace, and forgiveness to others.

Our human interactions are very dependent on our divine relationship!  We cannot give what we do not have within.

So, I am going to start with the radical display of God's love for each of us.  (Some of us just don't realize how much He loves us and in what way He does...)

As I think of grace, mercy, kindness, forbearance, forgiveness I come to realize that none of this is even possible unless I am first impacted with the love of God.

As I referred to Ephesians 3:17, let's take a look into this passage starting in verse 14.  Paul is praying a prayer for the Ephesian people that is for you and me today.

Ephesians 4:14-21

14) For this reason, I bow my knees before the Father, 

15) from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, 

16) that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man;

17) so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love,

18) may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, 

19) and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fulness of God.

20) Now to Him who is able to do exceeding abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us,

21) to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen.

When a plant roots itself in the dirt, it grows.

A tree can withstand massive storms when it is healthy and firmly rooted. (Yeah, I know - tornadoes and hurricanes can uproot even the most stable tree.)

To grow a flower, any fruit, or to produce any vegetable there has to be a root system.

If we are to love, offer mercy and grace, forgive those who wronged us etc it must start with our root system and that is - God's love for us personally.  Not for the next person.  Not for anyone else.  I must receive God and let His love change me as it roots and grounds my heart in Him.

So, we ask the question - "How can this be done?  How?"  

Since God is love, pure, and wholly love, we start with Him.  It says in Matthew 11:28-29, "Come, to Me, all you who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.  Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart; and you shall find rest for your souls."

We learn from Jesus.  We give as we have received.  We start with truth - the truth of God's love.

Jesus' love is unconditional; given while we were still sinners.  What anyone in the past has done, never altered God's love.  Actions caused results and consequences but never altered the truth that God loved that person.

Since He says He is faithful, the same yesterday, today, and forever; this same truth is for you and me today.  What we do or don't do does not alter God loving us.

When that gripped my heart, it altered my decisions and choices.

In the case of a misstep or wrong choice, the truth of God is - upon confession there is forgiveness and no condemnation in Jesus.

When slander and false accusations are said about me, the truth of God is - Jesus knows what that is like and in Him we can find refuge and a defense.

When I felt alone and missed by those around me, the truth of God is - He says He will never leave us or forsake us.

There is a truth and a promise of God's for each and every situation and belief and lie in your head and heart.  The truths are endless and when they grip your heart, the pain finds it's healing in the hands of a radical loving God.

Hurt people hurt people.  So, in the same way, healed people help bring healing.  God's foundational love in our own heart, does just that, brings healing and can enable us to rise above.

To love others in the radical way of Jesus requires the divine interruption within our own heart.

Love is not the gushy, feel-good, all-is-well type of love.  No, love in the way of Jesus causes us to sacrifice, to give when we want to retaliate, to find Him above all else.

I Corinthians 13 known as the love chapter and used in many weddings of ages past is really written for the people of the church, Jesus' people.  Really??  Why do we need those words?  Should we not just have it down pat after saying yes to Jesus?

We don't have to go far from our own house to realize we still continue to inhabit a human body and human way of thinking that needs a continuing saving and redeeming.

What's your first reaction when overlooked for a team, job, or friendship?

What's your first response when someone speaks untruth about you?

What rises up within at any offense or irritation from the person you do life with?

For me, it's not very often the Jesus' way.  Yes, I am learning and growing in this area, but it always comes with a wrestling and a surrendering to do it the way of Jesus.

To not retaliate and let vengeance in His hands.

To forgive, laying down my stones of blame and revenge.

To walk another mile when I am weary and want to walk away.

To face the one who betrays and denies with value and truth, as Jesus did.

To be able to utter the words along with Jesus, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do."

As the list in I Corinthians says - love doesn't keep track of wrongs, it rejoices and weeps with those who do so, it's not arrogant but kind.  Love bears, believes, hopes, and endures all things.

How can I forbear, show compassion, forgive, and be gentle, putting on love as it tells us in Colossians 3:12-14 - again and again?

(Again, this is not condoning abusive situations or unhealthy ones; but to make wise decisions and not based on revenge or unforgiveness but with the wisdom and direction of God.)

This I cannot do - of my own strength or human understanding.  It is only as I choose and allow the mind of Christ to invade my own human mind and way of thinking.  It is to let Jesus transform and change me from the inside out!

Jesus never retaliated or spoke unkindly about anyone or to anyone.  It was always truth with love, inviting even the Pharisee and Publican to know Him.  His many parables were a way of showing who He was and inviting them to let His truths change them.  For some it did, but for many it did not.  

Truth with love always gives two options - either you will receive it and let it change you or you will walk away and it will be a heavy weight and to continue to resist it will cause anger to rise up within you till in your own way, you cry, "Crucify!"

God's love is found in the truth of who He is.  It is given freely and without condition.  The only condition it has is that it requires us to receive it by learning more of the One who loves us and letting it impact our heart.  If it hasn't changed you then you have not received it.

Will you receive it, letting it interrupt your pain with the truth of who He is?  To receive it you must lay down the stone of blame toward whoever is behind your pain.  As long as you hold onto your expectations of how you want something done or how it should be, you cannot receive anything else, including God's love.  To open your hand is to give opportunity to the greatest and most radical grace of the love of God.  (Let me insert here and acknowledge that to open your hand is an excruciating step and process to our human heart and mind's way of thinking.  It's half the battle.  But let me tell from experience, it's worth the risk to open up the hand and let go of all that is heavy to receive the freedom and love of God.)

Fear loses its grip as God's love grips your heart.  You will then have a foundation, a source to give to others.

God shows you how to love by loving you.

His two commandments are first - to love Him with all of you - your heart, mind, soul, and strength.  The second - to love others as you love yourself.

You cannot give what you do not have.  You get by receiving and knowing God's love - the radical and foundational grace of all.

Living God's Radical Way Requires God's Transforming Power

 

Many years ago, I did this as a visual, a reminder
of the grace and forgiveness I have received that needs
to be extended to the one who hurt me.  (Maybe this
visual will help you, too.)

The three years that Jesus spent teaching and healing were filled with showing us the way of the kingdom of God.  He spoke often of the kingdom of God.  

Jesus came to show us who God is.  He told the people of that day that you can only know God and come to Him through Himself.

The way of God that Jesus spoke of and showed us was a way that was directly opposite of our human way of doing things.

The people wanted rescued from the fierce and cruel Roman rule.  They were promised a Messiah that would free them.  They had their own ideas of what and how that should look like.

They were met head on with a different way.  Jesus, the Rabbi, the Messiah, spoke -

He spoke of not retaliating, eye for eye, but whoever slaps you turn the other cheek.

If someone takes your coat, give him your cloak also.

Their custom was that if a Roman asked you to carry something for him you were only obligated to go one mile.  Jesus said, "Take it two miles".

Jesus told the people that His kingdom doesn't fight.

He said that to give is to receive.

Jesus said to love others as He has loved us.

And one of the hardest maybe and one that feels so very unjust is - to forgive.  Not once. Not seven times - but 70 x 7.  More than we will keep track of is the point, again.  And again.

(Now I am in no way advocating abuse or letting someone run over you and Jesus isn't either.  I believe this is a way that Jesus was saying - show love, grace, and compassion.)

I sit with these statements and realize an underlying theme that my heart wrestles with - the radical ways of God that Jesus lived, modeled for us, and told us to go and do likewise as He has done, is beyond my human capacity.  I must know Him and His transforming power to be able to go and do.

As I wrestled with this - feelings of unfairness and unjustness come rising to the surface.  Don't we need to do justice?  

I don't get very far as I learn of Jesus and look at the way He lived to know and to realize that no, I don't get to live with how and what I think justice should look like.  His ways are radical and don't make sense to my human way of thinking.  And isn't that the point?!  Jesus' way is opposite to the way of the human.  Jesus' way is opposite and in direct conflict to the enemy - Satan.

Jesus' way cannot be lived out, followed, or given to another human being unless He first impacts our own heart.

We absolutely will not love, forgive, or go beyond if it is up to us.  (Or am I alone in this??)  I don't think so.  We fight the 'Romans' in our lives.  We lash out to those who hurt us, giving eye for eye and even with a bit more punch.  Well, maybe we don't do it so outright.  It just may be a bit more subtle, slyly for we are Christians, aren't we?  We are only standing for truth, we might say.

As the woman taken in adultery, dragged by men of religion to be condemned.  They held the stones, ready to hurl them to the woman.  By their law they could.  They had every right to throw the stones.

But they asked Jesus what they should do to this woman. (John 8:4)

Jesus doesn't say a word but stoops.  He stoops down and touches the ground and begins to write in the dirt of the earth.

As the words take form, they persist in asking Him what to do.

Jesus rises up and straightens Himself and speaks the words, "He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her."

Then Jesus stoops again and writes some more.

And slowly, but surely the leaving begins.  First the oldest one leaves and then the next one, followed by another - until -

Jesus once again straightens Himself and turns to the woman crouching before Him.  He asks her, "Woman, where are they?  Did no one condemn you?"

And she replies, "No one, Lord."

Jesus then tells her, "I do not condemn you, either.  Go.  From now on do not sin any longer."

Radical.  (Yes.)

Unfair.  (Most certainly)

We do not have recorded the words Jesus wrote in the dirt of the earth.  There are many thoughts on that.

I believe it was in some way words of grace.  Their sin mentioned along with the grace extended to them.  For in the presence of grace and remembering our receiving of it, stones are laid down.

When we hold stones of judgement, (however right they are), compassion cannot happen.  In the presence of Jesus and when we remember how we have received His mercy, grace, and forgiveness we will lay down our stones of blame, justice, and revenge.  When justice and judgement is laid down there is room for compassion.

Honestly, the only way to live the radical ways of Jesus is for His grace to impact my own heart.  I cannot give what I do not have.

This takes us to the two greatest commandments that Jesus told us.  The first is to love Him with our all of ourselves - our heart, mind, soul, and strength.  The second one is to love our neighbor as ourselves.

You and I cannot give what we do not own.  Unless God's grace, mercy, love, and forgiveness grip my heart I will cast stones and compassion will not take place.

If you wrestle with this way, you are not alone.  I have.  I will admit to that.  It is not my way naturally.  As Jesus wrestled in Gethsemane to do the way of God, you and I have our own 'Gethsemane' moments of wrestling to do the will and way of God.

This is where the power of the resurrection enables us.  Because of Jesus, when we choose Him, we find our way through the garden of Gethsemane and as we face the 'Judas' in our own stories- the ones who hurt us'.

When we love and forgive we are showing who God is.  The only way possible to love and forgive and offer grace is first of all to know God.  It's more than knowing about Him.  It's knowing Him deep within.  It's understanding what Jesus has given to us personally and allowing it to change us. Then and only then do we have something to offer to each other.  Through that understanding, Jesus' transforming power enables us to live His radical ways.

The Weight of Death and the Power of Life

 

This week - after Holy Week that held both praise and criticism, worship and cries of death, promises and broken promises, the grave and resurrection - we may find ourselves continuing to feel both the weight of death in so many ways and also the power of life because of the resurrection.

Holy Week reminds us of a time and place and happenings in the life of Jesus.  It invites us to think of more than of eggs and bunnies and chocolate.  It invites us to remember the One who came and the reason why He came - Immanuel.

Holy Week holds both joy and grief.  Both celebration and crucifixion.  Both life and death.  Both those who chose Jesus and those who rejected Him.  It holds space for the tomb and the bursting forth from the tomb.  It holds glorious resurrection - the conquering of death - the power of life!

To truly know the power of life we will also know deeply the weight of death and weakness and silent Saturday's of waiting and wondering.

This hard reality holds a mystery of the ways of God that are so opposite of our human thinking.  That to give is to gain and to serve is great.  That to know loss we can know the gain of something more important.

We know physical graves of loved ones we laid them in.  Mourning the loss of who they are to us.  We know the 'graves' of buried dreams, of loss that laid us low, and of disappointments and rejections that pierce our hearts.

But the life of Jesus, His resurrection from the grave holds the torch of hope for us all as we stand at those graves and weep.  It gives us a way through, a path to see beyond the grave that stands before us.  

It offers us the truth that the grave is not the end of the story, it does not have the last say.  Jesus does!

His power is greater than the power of the world.  His Spirit is greater than the spirit of the world.  And that - that gets me so excited because He wants to infuse me with that same power and strength to rise above the grief and weight of death.

In those moments when the weight of death overwhelms our heart and soul, He comes alongside us and says, "I will be with you.  I am with you."  

He is our Advocate, our High Priest, the One who knows the weight of death but also rose in the power of life.  The grave opened to show us He was not in there.

To know the Resurrection Sunday, we will also know the weight of the grave of Friday and the silence of Saturday.

To those who are in the Friday and Saturday's of life - it's okay.  The disciples also wondered in those hours, they too struggled to understand what all was happening as the One who they believed was their Master and Saviour was laid in the tomb.  The women went to honour Him that Sunday morning.  They went, in their grief, to honour Him.

As they stood at the empty grave, more grief of "Where is He?" echoed and bounced around in their hearts.

An angel spoke words of life - "He is not here, He is risen.  Behold, this is the place He laid.  Go. Go and tell... and remember - remember what He told you".  

The disciples went and in Mark 16:8 it says they went with trembling and astonishment.  Amazement and fear.  They had nothing to say and yet fear stayed with them.

Mary stayed.  She stayed by the tomb weeping, weeping with the unanswered questions she held in her heart.  She didn't know where Jesus was, even if He would be in this tomb at least she would know, something would make sense.   But this?  This doesn't.

As she turns around a man asks her why she is weeping. 

Oh, the care of Jesus when we don't even recognize Him in our grief.  I weep with the sheer magnitude of this truth.

She, thinking it to be the gardener, pleads with him to inform her of where Jesus may be.  Her heart was in turmoil - until.  Until the Master spoke her name - and then she knew.  

Mary then goes and tells.  No, she announces, "I have seen the Lord."  Announcing isn't just saying it, it gives the picture of loudly saying, declaring, and with emotion.

Jesus speaks your name and mine.  In our grief, Jesus comes, holding out His nail-scarred hands to offer us His life, light, and truth of who He is.  And when, we too, see the Lord, we leave changed, embolden and declaring the ways of the Lord.  I have seen the Lord!

I have had my own questions and wrestlings that include confusion and wondering where Jesus is.  My pain doesn't always end with the good news of "He is risen" and so I'm left with what to do when life doesn't make sense.  I don't believe I am alone in this for I have heard cries of the same.  Our enemy wants us to believe the grave is the end, that Friday wins.

But guess what?  IT DOESN'T! 

Jesus is our Hope, our Peace and He tells us, "It is I".  He invited Thomas, as he wrestled with all that had happened - to "Reach here...".  "Reach here and put your finger, and see My hands; reach here your hand, and put it in My side; and be not unbelieving, but believing."  John 20:26-27

Jesus was so tender with their grief, their questions, understanding their confusion and in His gentleness He comforted them, reminding them, and bringing evidence of who He is.

And so it is for you and I today.  In our moments of grief, questions, the pain, and when His ways don't make sense - He comes.  He invites us to reach for Him.  He speaks our name.  He comes and is here with gentleness and the power of life that is greater than the weight of death.

The Sorrow of Gethsemane

 

(These photos are not Gethsemane but maybe how I picture it to be a bit... :) )

Gethsemane - the pressing of the soul.  The meaning of Gethsemane is oil press. 

Gethsemane is where we see the agony of Jesus as He wrestled with what He was about to walk through.

We have the written account in Matthew 26:36-56 and Mark 14:43-52.

Jesus and His disciples went to this garden.  It was a garden often visited by Jesus.  He told His disciples to sit at a place while He went to pray.  Jesus took three of them with Him, further to the place where He wanted to be.

Jesus spoke to Peter, James, and John of the grief He was feeling.  It was a deep grief.  He invited them to keep watch with Him - to pray and then Jesus went a little further on from them.

Jesus falls on His face and wrestles with His Father about the cup that was His.

Jesus returns to the three disciples to find them asleep.   

Jesus wakes them up, disappointment etching His words, "What, could you not watch with Me for one hour?"  Remember - He shared His heart with them.  Again, He invites them to partner with Him in His grief.

And again, Jesus returns to find them asleep.  He lets them sleep and goes to pray a third time, wrestling with same cup, alone.

Gethsemane holds the moment of the time in our dark nights of our soul where it is just you and God.  As well meaning and unintentional people around us may be or not be, there is this space where we wrestle with our cup, alone with God.

Gethsemane is also the place of surrender.  Surrendering to the Father.  Surrendering to the possibilities that lie within the dark night of wrestling.  Surrendering to the love that God has for us and believing that that love will keep us through the hard and in the dark.

In some ways I'd love to know a bit more of the details.  Why did the disciples keep sleeping?  The Scripture tells us their eyes were heavy. Heavy with what??  Were they overwhelmed, scared and sleep seemed to be the way to calm their minds and fears?  Were they really tired?  

Jesus told them to arise and then He leads the way, stepping toward the one who would betray Him, giving Him away to a group of soldiers and onto the path that the cup held.

Have you felt this agony of the soul?  The darkness, the aloneness, the deep grief of crying out to God and wrestling with the moment that you find yourself in.  Pressed.  Wrung out.  For what? And why?

I too have felt the wrestling, wept the tears, and agonized for it to be taken away.   

And what about stepping toward the very thing that hurts - denial, betrayal, beatings, mockery, spitting, and even death.

Jesus went this way for you and me.  We go this way for Him.

Gethsemane - the place of the press.

Gethsemane - the surrender to the God who loves and believing that that love will keep you as you face your hard.

The Hope of Life

 

Jesus said in John 14:6 - "I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father except through Me."

After the season of winter, spring is impatiently awaited.  The bare earth slowly gives way, releasing the life that laid buried within.  We greet it with delight as the grass starts to green up and the branches of the trees start to show the hue of the coming of leaves.  Daffodils wave their yellow heads and we smile with the joy they bring as they grace the brown ground with colour.

Life speaks hope and hope stirs life.  The spring growth breathes hope and life and energy into our souls.

Jesus wants to breathe life into our broken and bare parts.  When we choose Jesus we choose life.  As we walk through pain, rejection, disappointments, and so on, Jesus wants us to know Him.  He knows that when we choose Him, we learn of Him and life takes root in our heart and mind.

When we're blindsided by a storm of pain we are in a winter where the harsh winds blow.  We see nothing of life and can feel quite bare.  But when we put our roots down a little bit further, anchoring our hearts in the truths of God - the seeds of life start their roots.  One day, a coming spring day, they slowly push through the bare and brown surface and we start to see the life that was all the while within.

When we choose the Way and stay with the Way, we learn to know Him as Truth and Life will always take root and bloom.

When Life Looks and Feels Mundane - Brown and Bare - There Just May Be Life Within

 

I mentioned in my previous post how March can get a bad rap known to be...  Brown.  Drab.  Mud. Bare. 

Yes, it is all true and in this season, we long for warmth and color.

Let's continue on this journey to see what is within and the possibilities that lie within the soil and trees. I'm continuing to invite you to look beyond and maybe if you think of the tree for who and what it is - it just may shift your thoughts about this season of not yet - the in between of winter and the warm spring air.

You see, sometimes I find it quite real and true of myself and relate with the bare, brown, and mundane landscape of the March season. 

What you see across the landscape is the brown and bareness of the trees, as they stand in the mundane, common, and with vulnerability.  The trees and ground are void of the color of the sharp green grass, the yellow daffodils, the green that fills the branches of the trees, the various colors of the flowers that will eventually shoot forth and grace us with their beauty.

But let's stop for a moment and pause.  What you see of the tree and the ground is really what creates the space for all that beauty.  As the tree stands, stripped and bare of visible color and life, it stands vulnerable with life within.

I remember vividly a long season that I passed through the typical four seasons and stayed in the one that found me bare and void of visible productivity.  As I was taking a walk one afternoon and the sun was gracing the brown and the bare trees, the thought flashed through my mind - 'it's beautiful.'

Wait.  What?  Brown and bare = beautiful; no way!

Life is more than the fruit, the leaves, and the color.  Life is really what is within.  For the fruit, the leaves, and the color only happen as a result of what is within.  If the tree is dead within, no visible life will happen without or at least not for very long and most certainly won't withstand a wind storm.

This spoke to me and I saw the bare and brown of the landscape as beautiful in its own way for it truly holds the truest of life.

I, too, find myself in seasons and times that leave me stripped and bare.  But like the tree as it puts its roots down, resting and replenishing itself for the coming spring and summer's growth; I too, am called to put my roots down in Jesus, learning more of who He is.

He is Life and wants me to know Him as the Abundant Life.

Life within matters more than visible life without.  As the sun's rays warm the earth we see the stirrings of that life come to the surface.

The maple trees are tapped as the sun's warming rays stir the life within.  Sap is turned into syrup which we enjoy on our pancakes.  Grass starts to turn green.  The trees take on the hue of the emerging colour of leaves.  The new shoots of green that burst forth as spring daffodils, forsythia, lilacs, snowdrops and more start to color the landscape is invigorating.

In the mundane, the normal, the bareness creates a space to appreciate all this emerging life that laid silent within the earth and trees. 

To know color and the beauty of flowers we must know the season of rest and life within.  If there was always production, always a giving, when would we and nature ever rest and replenish?

So, as the white winter gives way to muddy March and the cold winds that still blow - stay.  Stay and remember the season of growth cannot be hurried and there is something right now that grows us, within, if we train our eyes to see life.  

Maybe God is inviting you to sit in this season of bare, mundane, and vulnerability to learn more of who are in Him without any external validation.

Maybe He is inviting you to understand the life within that is stirring, unseen but oh so alive, just waiting for the warmth of spring to stir it to something more - the birthing of life without.

Bare, Brown, and Beautiful Landscape

 

March is known for its mud, brown, and drab appearance.  It gets a bad rap as the white winter snows melt away and the ground thaws leaving mud in its wake and weather that gives way to spring rains mixed with winter's slushy precipitation.  One day it's warm with the tantalizing promise of spring only to have winter's grip grace us with water that comes in the form of sleet or snow.

What do we do with this month?

As I look at the landscape as the trees stand without their leaves and exposed.  I am reminded of a truth - life is hidden within.  I can complain about the brown and mud (and yes, I do too sometimes) or I can be aware and reminded that the tree is not beautiful because of its leaves or fruit; no, it's beautiful because it's life.  We don't have to like the mud and brown landscape but we can choose to see what's beyond and within it.

The tree stands as it is.  What you see is really who the tree is.  Without what you see - there would be no leaves or fruit in a few months.  Right now the life is within and the tree is resting inside and can stand in the harsh winds of winter because of the life within itself.

The landscape of brown grass that stretches out before us, contains the life within, waiting for the warmth of the sun and the longer light of the days to stir it to green and lush.

This truth hits home to my heart.  I too, can stand in life's hard and harsh winds and storms because of the life within me - the breath and life of Jesus.  I am not defined by what I do or what I say.  I am not defined by the leaves of success as the world defines it or even my own definition.  I am not defined by the bareness that I feel without at times, and that I may feel within.  I am not who I am because of what I do or don't do.  I am who I am because of Jesus.

This changes the way I view the trees and the landscape.  It also changes the way I see myself and the way I weather the storms.

It is holy ground.  I stand in awe and worship.  

When we see ourselves through the eyes of God, our Creator and Lover, we will bend in the winds but not  be knocked over.  We can stand tall as we stand bare and vulnerable.  We're not defined by the changing seasons and times because the Life within us defines us.

I invite you to see the brown and bare as beautiful.  It's beautiful because in all the vulnerability of the tree, the life is within.  Sometimes in all honesty, I, too, feel stripped - bare and brown to the world around me.  Even here, the life that can happen within is the beauty of the bare, brown, and beautiful vulnerability.

It's so freeing to not be defined by what 'hangs on the tree' of who I am.  For whether I am successful or hidden, whether I am producing or resting - I am loved!

You see, when I am stripped of what seems to be my identity and I stand bare and vulnerable, it creates the space for me to find out who I really am and gives opportunity for me to keep on remembering Whose I am - God's.

Settle in closer to God.  Worship Him with your wounds and your joys.  Worship Him with the both/and of life that you may be walking through.  Stay with Jesus - with hope because spring will come.

The Gripping Faithful Love of God Our Father

 

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear.

I John 4:18a

It doesn’t take long to know fear and for some reason it seems to override the presence of love pretty easily. Unknowns leave us feeling out of control and grasping for something to keep us steady. Broken relationships leave us stranded and fearing the aloneness that threatens to suffocate us. The phone call we receive that informs us of a sudden diagnosis or words that leave us reeling in their wake.

I remember a day in fifth grade. It was the last period of the school day and it was a time to get school work completed so books would not need to be carried home. For some unknown reason, I was the object of others' unkindness. I carried books home. I also began to carry a fear.

I began to fear others, trying to figure out what was wrong with me so I could fit in and be accepted. It became my framework, broken as it was.

February is a month that tosses the word love around pretty freely. The question that bears asking is, “What really is love?”

Why do we search and seek for love in so many wrong places? What drives us? Do you feel the ache of searching for love?

Our relationships and connections here on this earth are limited and faulty. Not one of us loves perfectly. The brokenness of earthly love leaves us gripping, grasping and searching for - something.

There is One who does love perfectly and that is God. God is love. It is who He is. I John 4:7 is one of the many verses that tell us that love is from God. 

Fear and love are two companions that want to keep us company. The unique thing is - they cannot both be our good friends. One or the other keeps its grip on our heart. Only one is a good companion.

Decades after that day in fifth grade and in the middle of the darkness of health complications and estranged relationships, I reached out in desperation to know God even more and in ways deeper than ever I had known. As the days and months turned into years, I was surprised by the unexpected transformation of knowing God’s love in deep ways.

When God’s love becomes rooted and grounded in our hearts, it anchors us in each and every storm we encounter, steadying us. When God’s love grips our heart fear loses its grip.  

We can say with David in Psalm 56:11, In God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me? Psalm 118:6, The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me?

We wrestle with understanding God’s love because we tend to interpret it with the tangible and limited love of those around us - our parents, friends, partners, etc. We must let go of that framework and learn to trust God, believing His truth that He is love and He loves - period. He loved us while we were sinners. He sent Jesus, His Son, to be our Saviour because He loves us so much He provided the way back to Him.

As we struggle to believe His love, it’s an invitation to lean in towards Him and to ask Him to show us. Pain and fear disorients us and we lash out. God is usually the recipient of our anger and questions. It’s okay, He isn’t afraid of them. So, lean in towards Him with courage to ask Him to reveal to you how much He loves you.

His perfect love will cast out the fear in your heart. It’s the only way to dispel fear. Fear loses its grip as God’s faithful love grips your heart.