Thursday, August 11, 2022

The God-Filled Space in Relationships











God. People. Relationships. 

God created man and formed Eve out of man. Breathing into man His own breath and man became a living soul, living with the very breath of God. This creation was different than what God created previously. 

Deeply connected to God. Created, not spoken into existence. Breath from the very being of God.
Two people carry the breath and life of God in their very being. Two people who are to carry on the image of God, passing it on in their own connection and relationship.

It didn't take long to mar and forever change the way relationships were.

In connectedness, community, and relationships; pain happens. 
In connectedness, community, and relationships; healing and health happens. 

But not a saving. That's for Jesus. He's our Saviour, our Redeemer. 
Before I am aware at times, I so often am expecting people to save me, to come through for me.

Relationships are quite the tug of war, quite the i-want-them and then-i-don't. I want to live alone and then it's not enough. 

We are created for relating to each other. We were established to help each other, reminding each other of Jesus.  Reminding us to remember who Jesus is and who we are in Him.  Reminding each other what Eve questioned and we often question too, that God DOES have our good in mind, in the very core of His being.  

I find when I place the proper expectations of what God established for relationships, I want to live in them. 

As a result of the sin; brokenness, pain, and shame entered our relationships.  We now know good and evil.  Pain and joy.

God said He would provide a Saviour, a Redeemer. He would provide a way back, a redeeming of all broken. 

And it does us well to remember that. Because in the space of all the broken in our relationships, is the space that only God can fill and redeem. It's in connectedness to Jesus that heals the deepest, a staying with Him.  Depending on Jesus and finding Him, is not hinged on any physical or tangible person.  And that allows for healing in the deepest parts and corners of our hearts and souls.
,
There are many variables that can hinder that healing and finding Jesus. 

We are to walk together, helping each other, but in the painful and aching spaces, that's the space for our Saviour and Redeemer.

As Joni Eareckson Tada states, "To press in to Jesus and to know Him is the purpose of suffering."  Not what it does to me, how it grows my prayer life or makes me a better person, no, it's to know more of Jesus.   Songs of Suffering film is a short documentary by Joni that is so inspiring to find Jesus in the hard.

It's so easy to blame the people we can see and physically interact with, to put the responsibility on them to do and say the right thing.  

And that's the tug of war, the push/pull of relationships. 

Because as people interacting with each other we do have a responsibility to interact in the ways of Jesus, kindness, honoring, patient, loving, etc.

And when that doesn't happen, pain and hurt hurl us to blame if we're not careful.  And please hear me, I'm not advocating that we just take it without dialogue or conversation of some sort.

But what I am saying and where I have wrestled intensely with disappointment and feeling missed or overlooked or even like I don't matter, is there in the midst of all that, is the space to press in to Jesus.  The space that only He can really fill and wants to fill.  

The space where He wants to heal us, even if...  To heal us in spite of anything around us or anyone.  That to me is liberating!  Because my healing and freedom doesn't hinge on anything or anyone!

I can sit on a trash heap and sing with joy because it's inside me.  I can see beauty because beauty is to be seen somewhere and in something and it isn't hinged on my surroundings. (good surroundings sure help, though 😉)

One thing I've learned in my suffering journey is, God wants to be known, just like I want to be known.  God wants to be loved, just like I want to be loved.

And that, has so influenced and changed me in the midst of disappointments, pain, and relating with people.

And from that God-filled space perspective, we own and make our decisions as we interact with each other.  Taking the painful pieces to Jesus to sort through so we don't live in a reactionary place, swinging our pain that only adds to what's going on.

Healing and healed people, encourage others.
Hurt people, hurt people.

I know.  It may sound harsh and unfair.  And in a lot of ways it is. But really, finding healing in the presence of Jesus is a gift because it can happen whether or not the other person cooperates with reconciliation or not.

So, my dear friends and fellow sojourners, let's find Jesus in those spaces of loneliness, pain, denial, and hurt.  To find Jesus enough and His healing is so liberating and that's exactly why Jesus came.  He came to heal the brokenhearted, preach deliverance or release to the captives, recovery of sight to the blind, and set free those who are oppressed. (Luke 4:18)

Some of the most free and healed people are oe were in some of the most hard places.  I think of Corrie Ten Boom, Elizabeth Elliot, Fanny Crosby, Hellen Keller, and many today like Joni Eareckson Tada, Jennifer Rothschild, and even you.  Because in all reality we all have hard we live in and walk through.  Some live in it more intensely.  Each of us carry something deep in our hearts that we would rather not have to carry.  Each of us have a place, that in the end only Jesus can heal and fill.

Bitterness blinds.  Pain oppresses and keeps one captive. Hard breaks my heart.  And in those moments I'm given a choice as I navigate whether I find Jesus more deeply or allow my blindness, oppression to keep me captive.   

Jesus' mission to helping us find freedom does not say anything that includes the one who caused the disappointment, pain, or rejection.  It's only Jesus.  He will heal as we let Him. (Reconciliation is another facet that doesn't swing the door on our healing.)

I want Jesus in those spaces that hurt.