How Jesus lived and leads is so often different from the way I thought it would look.
And so it was with the disciples and people of the days He walked the earth-lands.
I'm seeing in a more real way the struggle and disappointment many faced as they walked with Jesus. The struggle to believe and the tension of the heartstrings to trust the heart of Jesus when life makes little or no sense.
The Romans were a people that were ruthless, hard, and had little to no mercy and many were waiting for someone stronger to subdue them.
The disciples often wanted Jesus to sweep in and take over.
What did He say?
Love your enemies. Do good to them that hate you. Go the second mile. My kingdom is not of this world.
And on it goes...
Peter even went so far as to kill a man in the garden only to catch the ear. Jesus wasn't doing anything...
Fear settles in the hearts of many as Jesus, their leader, is crucified. Why? What happens to us??
Disillusionment. Anger. Disappointment. settles in. Many walk away. Others follow, with questions. Still others trust Jesus knowing He is the Messiah, even though they did not understand...
And, I too, want Someone bigger and stronger to right the wrongs, to subdue evil, to sweep in and take over...
And it often doesn't happen...
Disillusionment, anger, frustration grips my heart just as it did the disciples and others. I have, in that moment, the choice of those long ago --- Will I walk away, or stay, or believe the heart of Jesus and His words and trust Him, in the middle of questions and even disappointment?
Jesus just did not come like they thought a King or Messiah would come. He did not live like they expected Him to. And He did not lead in a way that they wanted Him to.
He called that of His followers... to live differently.
And so, it is today.
Will you trust Him when life hurts and makes little sense?
Do you believe He is good and has your good in mind?
Hard questions. Real stuff.
But there is a Greater Truth and that Truth is... JESUS LOVES US! HIS LOVE IS DEEP.
Let that love go deep in your heart and take root, again. Believe it until it creates a new groove of thinking in your heart.
It's a journey. A lifetime of understanding and learning of God and His love and learning to trust His heart towards us.
But the more we choose to believe, the stronger the root.
Love to you, my friends, my readers as you walk with God in the hard and easy. Sometimes we lose our way in the hard, it's hard to believe... May someone fight for you, believe for you, walk with you when you can't...
And remember when you feel as if you're alone.... you're not - there's a Greater Truth, God never leaves or forsakes us.
May you know and 'taste of' Him who loves us so much He stretched His arms and gave His life.
Let's give Him ours.
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