I Believe in the Sun Even When It's Not Shining

 

There are those days, those moments when the sun shines, the warmth is felt, all seems right in the world and faith and God seem near.  

There are also those days when the clouds hide the visibility of the sun and the day seems quite cloudy and uncertain.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As I sat outside one morning as this day was dawning, it was raining, foggy, and the birds were chirping.  Life was happening and the day dawning just like yesterday, but that day started with the colour in the sky and the sun appearing.

I reflected.  This morning is no different in the day dawning, except that is was raining and foggy.  The fog hid the sun but that did not mean the sun wasn't still shining.

So it is with our storms and rain and Jesus.  

When I was in my darkest stormy nights, Jesus felt far away.  I felt forgotten and often wondered if He cared or even still loves me.  (Yes, it is my weakness as I associate care, presence with being valued and loved.)  Prayers seemed to go unheeded or answered.

Through that and looking back, I see ways God was navigating and very present even when I could not see it or the darkness hid Him, just like the foggy morning hid the rising sun.

Faith.  Faith is believing in the presence of the Son, Jesus, even when what I am walking through is hiding His presence and I cannot see His workings.

Another day. Another morning. Repeat.

I wonder if you have this same experience?  I suspect you do, for we humans have the same struggles they only have a different face, maybe a different way it is seen or experienced.

You know, sometimes it's real easy to have faith in Jesus, the mountain top feel.  But the reality is, there are times it really is not so easy.

We recently experienced the eclipse of the sun.  For a minute or three, the day got dark and the sun obstructed by the moon.  Light and warmth were obstructed as the moon passed between us and the sun. It was a glorious moment to witness, but when the 'sun' gets eclipsed in my life it's really not such a glorious moment to live out.  

Faith is a choice.  A decision and a learning to know the heart of God and to trust Him, even if.  Faith is a decision to learn to really know God and to believe Him whether the sun is shining or not.

These words are easier to type than to live out.  These words I don't write lightly but I write them because it is true and to keep reminding my own fragile human heart that God is still good in the stormy night as He is in the sunlit, heartfelt moments.

The words to the song, I believe in the sun even when it's not shining, I believe in a God even when I can't see Him were written and inscribed on the walls of a prison concentration camp.  There were inscribed with a choice to stay with God, to believe Him even in the darkest and meanest of times.  

I don't believe they were written lightly.  They were written with a specific, faith-filled choice to believe God for who He is.

And I do the same.

Is it dark for you today?  Have you walked away from the God who loves you and is still good in the hard?  Maybe it is only a shift in your heart to not believe God or to think He doesn't care or you don't matter?

I know I have, it's easy to do when the hard washes over and knocks us down.  But I have also come back to stay.  To find refuge under the wings of our Almighty Father and to choose to believe His words of truth in a moment that screams otherwise.

Faith isn't faith until something doesn't make sense and you still stay with Jesus, trusting Him  and choosing to believe in His love and goodness; even if.