Jagged Edges
Our life’s story once held edges that were clean and smooth
Their shape and lines told of joy.
Their shape made sense in many ways.
They fit, at least for a time.
It may have been a brief moment.
Then for some reason, one day,
Death, sorrow, and pain disrupted that edge
Leaving it broken, shattered, and jagged.
My story line ripped and broke
And with its jagged edges, it left me bleeding.
My broken pieces, the jagged line
Don’t fit in that box.
Their edges pierce.
They bear a story that is worth listening to
But I am scared, shivering, and wondering.
What if you get too close, will you walk away?
My pieces and edge hurt me, they will hurt you.
I try a piece of purple cloth, wrapping it around me
hoping its royalty will cover those edges.
I straighten my hair, find an article of clothing that I feel good in.
Tomorrow, I try white, hoping to feel the thrill of clean.
I sing. I work. I create.
All the while, hoping it is seen more than my edges.
But it doesn't work.
The edges pierce the cloth.
Broken and jagged edges aren’t mended or healed by being discarded
They invite us to walk the hard path.
They invite us to step into bravery, donning on courage.
Courage to face them, run our fingers over the edges
And listen.
Listen to what they say.
Listen to the story they are trying to tell us.
Looking at them with tears,
Holding them and giving them a space to be.
What about your edges?
What if I get close?
Yes, they will hurt.
The question is -
Will you - Will I - don on courage?
Will we wrap it about us like a cloak,
Braving the jagged edges that our stories hold?
Will we allow them to take space and not fit in a box?
Our story edges are asking for a place to be.
In that place they break a bit more, smoothing the edge just a bit,
And we discover the jagged becomes a little less sharp.
Our broken pieces and jagged edges
Are not the whole story.
When we invite Jesus to sit with us,
Giving Him the jagged edged pieces –
He, in the way that only He can,
Fits those pieces back into our story
And they become part of the whole redeeming paradigm.
His hands and feet bear the marks of a broken edge.
His side was pierced
And His head bears the marks of the crown of thorns.
He was pierced.
He was broken.
For you and for me.
He is not afraid of your jagged edges.
He wants to touch them with His gentle, gracious, and healing touch.
He wants to whisper to you –
In My hands I will fit them into a masterpiece of redemption.
- words by Judith Lapp
The Lord is near the brokenhearted. Psalm 34:18
Cast all your care in Him, for He cares for you. I Peter 5:7
The mission of Jesus was and is to heal, to revive the smoking flax, and to set the prisoner free. Isaiah 42:3 & 61:1
There are times we need His healing touch on wounded and bleeding hearts. Like the woman who bled physically for 12 years, we too bleed. We bleed inside from a harsh word spoken to us. Maybe our parents spoke words of shame and condemnation. Those friends in school may have left us on the edge. That job you really wanted was given to someone else. Maybe you simply wonder where in this big world do I fit?
There are also those times that life just kinda snuffs the life within and we close our hearts as we shut down to protect ourselves. Life feels to raw to be vulnerable.
And then in the middle of all that we lock ourselves in. We make declarations and try a little harder to look good, to be an asset, and all the while we feel the chains. The chains of "I will never", "I will not..." Bitterness can so quickly take its hold as we remember the injustices and pain.
Our stories hold pieces that may be out of our control, like when we're little and someone big took advantage of us in any way. Our stories may hold the silent bleeding of wanting to fit in, in this big world. Our stories may hold the "too soon taking- away" of someone we love.
Whatever pain shattered the edges of your joy and live and life, know that it matters.
Let's sit for a moment, tracing those jagged edges.
Now let's reach, like that bleeding woman did those many years ago. She reached toward Jesus with faith. She thought, "If I could but touch the hem of His garment, I could find healing. " Let's reach toward him. With faith. I imagine her reach may have been cautious but bold. It was done in and among the throng of people, very likely not wanting to be seen.
I wonder if she expected to simply go home, healed and changed?
Faith, a belief in Jesus, is all you need in the midst of your broken pieces.
Because Jesus is the master Healer and He takes those pieces you cast on Him and in the way that only He can, He fits them together to make something new. Isaiah 43:19, reminds us that He does something new, rivers in the desert and roadways in the wilderness.
Our story from the past is fit together with our story of today. Jesus blends and fits the pieces together to tell a new story, a redemption story. We don't need to discard one for the other or even choose one above the other, but they can become one to make a whole.
You will very likely be left in awe and wonderment at what healing just took place. You will join the many people who experienced Jesus's love, gentle grace, and healing touch and were in awe. I know I have and it's possible for you too.
Much love,
Judith
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