The Weight of Death and the Power of Life

 

This week - after Holy Week that held both praise and criticism, worship and cries of death, promises and broken promises, the grave and resurrection - we may find ourselves continuing to feel both the weight of death in so many ways and also the power of life because of the resurrection.

Holy Week reminds us of a time and place and happenings in the life of Jesus.  It invites us to think of more than of eggs and bunnies and chocolate.  It invites us to remember the One who came and the reason why He came - Immanuel.

Holy Week holds both joy and grief.  Both celebration and crucifixion.  Both life and death.  Both those who chose Jesus and those who rejected Him.  It holds space for the tomb and the bursting forth from the tomb.  It holds glorious resurrection - the conquering of death - the power of life!

To truly know the power of life we will also know deeply the weight of death and weakness and silent Saturday's of waiting and wondering.

This hard reality holds a mystery of the ways of God that are so opposite of our human thinking.  That to give is to gain and to serve is great.  That to know loss we can know the gain of something more important.

We know physical graves of loved ones we laid them in.  Mourning the loss of who they are to us.  We know the 'graves' of buried dreams, of loss that laid us low, and of disappointments and rejections that pierce our hearts.

But the life of Jesus, His resurrection from the grave holds the torch of hope for us all as we stand at those graves and weep.  It gives us a way through, a path to see beyond the grave that stands before us.  

It offers us the truth that the grave is not the end of the story, it does not have the last say.  Jesus does!

His power is greater than the power of the world.  His Spirit is greater than the spirit of the world.  And that - that gets me so excited because He wants to infuse me with that same power and strength to rise above the grief and weight of death.

In those moments when the weight of death overwhelms our heart and soul, He comes alongside us and says, "I will be with you.  I am with you."  

He is our Advocate, our High Priest, the One who knows the weight of death but also rose in the power of life.  The grave opened to show us He was not in there.

To know the Resurrection Sunday, we will also know the weight of the grave of Friday and the silence of Saturday.

To those who are in the Friday and Saturday's of life - it's okay.  The disciples also wondered in those hours, they too struggled to understand what all was happening as the One who they believed was their Master and Saviour was laid in the tomb.  The women went to honour Him that Sunday morning.  They went, in their grief, to honour Him.

As they stood at the empty grave, more grief of "Where is He?" echoed and bounced around in their hearts.

An angel spoke words of life - "He is not here, He is risen.  Behold, this is the place He laid.  Go. Go and tell... and remember - remember what He told you".  

The disciples went and in Mark 16:8 it says they went with trembling and astonishment.  Amazement and fear.  They had nothing to say and yet fear stayed with them.

Mary stayed.  She stayed by the tomb weeping, weeping with the unanswered questions she held in her heart.  She didn't know where Jesus was, even if He would be in this tomb at least she would know, something would make sense.   But this?  This doesn't.

As she turns around a man asks her why she is weeping. 

Oh, the care of Jesus when we don't even recognize Him in our grief.  I weep with the sheer magnitude of this truth.

She, thinking it to be the gardener, pleads with him to inform her of where Jesus may be.  Her heart was in turmoil - until.  Until the Master spoke her name - and then she knew.  

Mary then goes and tells.  No, she announces, "I have seen the Lord."  Announcing isn't just saying it, it gives the picture of loudly saying, declaring, and with emotion.

Jesus speaks your name and mine.  In our grief, Jesus comes, holding out His nail-scarred hands to offer us His life, light, and truth of who He is.  And when, we too, see the Lord, we leave changed, embolden and declaring the ways of the Lord.  I have seen the Lord!

I have had my own questions and wrestlings that include confusion and wondering where Jesus is.  My pain doesn't always end with the good news of "He is risen" and so I'm left with what to do when life doesn't make sense.  I don't believe I am alone in this for I have heard cries of the same.  Our enemy wants us to believe the grave is the end, that Friday wins.

But guess what?  IT DOESN'T! 

Jesus is our Hope, our Peace and He tells us, "It is I".  He invited Thomas, as he wrestled with all that had happened - to "Reach here...".  "Reach here and put your finger, and see My hands; reach here your hand, and put it in My side; and be not unbelieving, but believing."  John 20:26-27

Jesus was so tender with their grief, their questions, understanding their confusion and in His gentleness He comforted them, reminding them, and bringing evidence of who He is.

And so it is for you and I today.  In our moments of grief, questions, the pain, and when His ways don't make sense - He comes.  He invites us to reach for Him.  He speaks our name.  He comes and is here with gentleness and the power of life that is greater than the weight of death.

The Sorrow of Gethsemane

 

(These photos are not Gethsemane but maybe how I picture it to be a bit... :) )

Gethsemane - the pressing of the soul.  The meaning of Gethsemane is oil press. 

Gethsemane is where we see the agony of Jesus as He wrestled with what He was about to walk through.

We have the written account in Matthew 26:36-56 and Mark 14:43-52.

Jesus and His disciples went to this garden.  It was a garden often visited by Jesus.  He told His disciples to sit at a place while He went to pray.  Jesus took three of them with Him, further to the place where He wanted to be.

Jesus spoke to Peter, James, and John of the grief He was feeling.  It was a deep grief.  He invited them to keep watch with Him - to pray and then Jesus went a little further on from them.

Jesus falls on His face and wrestles with His Father about the cup that was His.

Jesus returns to the three disciples to find them asleep.   

Jesus wakes them up, disappointment etching His words, "What, could you not watch with Me for one hour?"  Remember - He shared His heart with them.  Again, He invites them to partner with Him in His grief.

And again, Jesus returns to find them asleep.  He lets them sleep and goes to pray a third time, wrestling with same cup, alone.

Gethsemane holds the moment of the time in our dark nights of our soul where it is just you and God.  As well meaning and unintentional people around us may be or not be, there is this space where we wrestle with our cup, alone with God.

Gethsemane is also the place of surrender.  Surrendering to the Father.  Surrendering to the possibilities that lie within the dark night of wrestling.  Surrendering to the love that God has for us and believing that that love will keep us through the hard and in the dark.

In some ways I'd love to know a bit more of the details.  Why did the disciples keep sleeping?  The Scripture tells us their eyes were heavy. Heavy with what??  Were they overwhelmed, scared and sleep seemed to be the way to calm their minds and fears?  Were they really tired?  

Jesus told them to arise and then He leads the way, stepping toward the one who would betray Him, giving Him away to a group of soldiers and onto the path that the cup held.

Have you felt this agony of the soul?  The darkness, the aloneness, the deep grief of crying out to God and wrestling with the moment that you find yourself in.  Pressed.  Wrung out.  For what? And why?

I too have felt the wrestling, wept the tears, and agonized for it to be taken away.   

And what about stepping toward the very thing that hurts - denial, betrayal, beatings, mockery, spitting, and even death.

Jesus went this way for you and me.  We go this way for Him.

Gethsemane - the place of the press.

Gethsemane - the surrender to the God who loves and believing that that love will keep you as you face your hard.

The Hope of Life

 

Jesus said in John 14:6 - "I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father except through Me."

After the season of winter, spring is impatiently awaited.  The bare earth slowly gives way, releasing the life that laid buried within.  We greet it with delight as the grass starts to green up and the branches of the trees start to show the hue of the coming of leaves.  Daffodils wave their yellow heads and we smile with the joy they bring as they grace the brown ground with colour.

Life speaks hope and hope stirs life.  The spring growth breathes hope and life and energy into our souls.

Jesus wants to breathe life into our broken and bare parts.  When we choose Jesus we choose life.  As we walk through pain, rejection, disappointments, and so on, Jesus wants us to know Him.  He knows that when we choose Him, we learn of Him and life takes root in our heart and mind.

When we're blindsided by a storm of pain we are in a winter where the harsh winds blow.  We see nothing of life and can feel quite bare.  But when we put our roots down a little bit further, anchoring our hearts in the truths of God - the seeds of life start their roots.  One day, a coming spring day, they slowly push through the bare and brown surface and we start to see the life that was all the while within.

When we choose the Way and stay with the Way, we learn to know Him as Truth and Life will always take root and bloom.

When Life Looks and Feels Mundane - Brown and Bare - There Just May Be Life Within

 

I mentioned in my previous post how March can get a bad rap known to be...  Brown.  Drab.  Mud. Bare. 

Yes, it is all true and in this season, we long for warmth and color.

Let's continue on this journey to see what is within and the possibilities that lie within the soil and trees. I'm continuing to invite you to look beyond and maybe if you think of the tree for who and what it is - it just may shift your thoughts about this season of not yet - the in between of winter and the warm spring air.

You see, sometimes I find it quite real and true of myself and relate with the bare, brown, and mundane landscape of the March season. 

What you see across the landscape is the brown and bareness of the trees, as they stand in the mundane, common, and with vulnerability.  The trees and ground are void of the color of the sharp green grass, the yellow daffodils, the green that fills the branches of the trees, the various colors of the flowers that will eventually shoot forth and grace us with their beauty.

But let's stop for a moment and pause.  What you see of the tree and the ground is really what creates the space for all that beauty.  As the tree stands, stripped and bare of visible color and life, it stands vulnerable with life within.

I remember vividly a long season that I passed through the typical four seasons and stayed in the one that found me bare and void of visible productivity.  As I was taking a walk one afternoon and the sun was gracing the brown and the bare trees, the thought flashed through my mind - 'it's beautiful.'

Wait.  What?  Brown and bare = beautiful; no way!

Life is more than the fruit, the leaves, and the color.  Life is really what is within.  For the fruit, the leaves, and the color only happen as a result of what is within.  If the tree is dead within, no visible life will happen without or at least not for very long and most certainly won't withstand a wind storm.

This spoke to me and I saw the bare and brown of the landscape as beautiful in its own way for it truly holds the truest of life.

I, too, find myself in seasons and times that leave me stripped and bare.  But like the tree as it puts its roots down, resting and replenishing itself for the coming spring and summer's growth; I too, am called to put my roots down in Jesus, learning more of who He is.

He is Life and wants me to know Him as the Abundant Life.

Life within matters more than visible life without.  As the sun's rays warm the earth we see the stirrings of that life come to the surface.

The maple trees are tapped as the sun's warming rays stir the life within.  Sap is turned into syrup which we enjoy on our pancakes.  Grass starts to turn green.  The trees take on the hue of the emerging colour of leaves.  The new shoots of green that burst forth as spring daffodils, forsythia, lilacs, snowdrops and more start to color the landscape is invigorating.

In the mundane, the normal, the bareness creates a space to appreciate all this emerging life that laid silent within the earth and trees. 

To know color and the beauty of flowers we must know the season of rest and life within.  If there was always production, always a giving, when would we and nature ever rest and replenish?

So, as the white winter gives way to muddy March and the cold winds that still blow - stay.  Stay and remember the season of growth cannot be hurried and there is something right now that grows us, within, if we train our eyes to see life.  

Maybe God is inviting you to sit in this season of bare, mundane, and vulnerability to learn more of who are in Him without any external validation.

Maybe He is inviting you to understand the life within that is stirring, unseen but oh so alive, just waiting for the warmth of spring to stir it to something more - the birthing of life without.

Bare, Brown, and Beautiful Landscape

 

March is known for its mud, brown, and drab appearance.  It gets a bad rap as the white winter snows melt away and the ground thaws leaving mud in its wake and weather that gives way to spring rains mixed with winter's slushy precipitation.  One day it's warm with the tantalizing promise of spring only to have winter's grip grace us with water that comes in the form of sleet or snow.

What do we do with this month?

As I look at the landscape as the trees stand without their leaves and exposed.  I am reminded of a truth - life is hidden within.  I can complain about the brown and mud (and yes, I do too sometimes) or I can be aware and reminded that the tree is not beautiful because of its leaves or fruit; no, it's beautiful because it's life.  We don't have to like the mud and brown landscape but we can choose to see what's beyond and within it.

The tree stands as it is.  What you see is really who the tree is.  Without what you see - there would be no leaves or fruit in a few months.  Right now the life is within and the tree is resting inside and can stand in the harsh winds of winter because of the life within itself.

The landscape of brown grass that stretches out before us, contains the life within, waiting for the warmth of the sun and the longer light of the days to stir it to green and lush.

This truth hits home to my heart.  I too, can stand in life's hard and harsh winds and storms because of the life within me - the breath and life of Jesus.  I am not defined by what I do or what I say.  I am not defined by the leaves of success as the world defines it or even my own definition.  I am not defined by the bareness that I feel without at times, and that I may feel within.  I am not who I am because of what I do or don't do.  I am who I am because of Jesus.

This changes the way I view the trees and the landscape.  It also changes the way I see myself and the way I weather the storms.

It is holy ground.  I stand in awe and worship.  

When we see ourselves through the eyes of God, our Creator and Lover, we will bend in the winds but not  be knocked over.  We can stand tall as we stand bare and vulnerable.  We're not defined by the changing seasons and times because the Life within us defines us.

I invite you to see the brown and bare as beautiful.  It's beautiful because in all the vulnerability of the tree, the life is within.  Sometimes in all honesty, I, too, feel stripped - bare and brown to the world around me.  Even here, the life that can happen within is the beauty of the bare, brown, and beautiful vulnerability.

It's so freeing to not be defined by what 'hangs on the tree' of who I am.  For whether I am successful or hidden, whether I am producing or resting - I am loved!

You see, when I am stripped of what seems to be my identity and I stand bare and vulnerable, it creates the space for me to find out who I really am and gives opportunity for me to keep on remembering Whose I am - God's.

Settle in closer to God.  Worship Him with your wounds and your joys.  Worship Him with the both/and of life that you may be walking through.  Stay with Jesus - with hope because spring will come.

The Gripping Faithful Love of God Our Father

 

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear.

I John 4:18a

It doesn’t take long to know fear and for some reason it seems to override the presence of love pretty easily. Unknowns leave us feeling out of control and grasping for something to keep us steady. Broken relationships leave us stranded and fearing the aloneness that threatens to suffocate us. The phone call we receive that informs us of a sudden diagnosis or words that leave us reeling in their wake.

I remember a day in fifth grade. It was the last period of the school day and it was a time to get school work completed so books would not need to be carried home. For some unknown reason, I was the object of others' unkindness. I carried books home. I also began to carry a fear.

I began to fear others, trying to figure out what was wrong with me so I could fit in and be accepted. It became my framework, broken as it was.

February is a month that tosses the word love around pretty freely. The question that bears asking is, “What really is love?”

Why do we search and seek for love in so many wrong places? What drives us? Do you feel the ache of searching for love?

Our relationships and connections here on this earth are limited and faulty. Not one of us loves perfectly. The brokenness of earthly love leaves us gripping, grasping and searching for - something.

There is One who does love perfectly and that is God. God is love. It is who He is. I John 4:7 is one of the many verses that tell us that love is from God. 

Fear and love are two companions that want to keep us company. The unique thing is - they cannot both be our good friends. One or the other keeps its grip on our heart. Only one is a good companion.

Decades after that day in fifth grade and in the middle of the darkness of health complications and estranged relationships, I reached out in desperation to know God even more and in ways deeper than ever I had known. As the days and months turned into years, I was surprised by the unexpected transformation of knowing God’s love in deep ways.

When God’s love becomes rooted and grounded in our hearts, it anchors us in each and every storm we encounter, steadying us. When God’s love grips our heart fear loses its grip.  

We can say with David in Psalm 56:11, In God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me? Psalm 118:6, The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me?

We wrestle with understanding God’s love because we tend to interpret it with the tangible and limited love of those around us - our parents, friends, partners, etc. We must let go of that framework and learn to trust God, believing His truth that He is love and He loves - period. He loved us while we were sinners. He sent Jesus, His Son, to be our Saviour because He loves us so much He provided the way back to Him.

As we struggle to believe His love, it’s an invitation to lean in towards Him and to ask Him to show us. Pain and fear disorients us and we lash out. God is usually the recipient of our anger and questions. It’s okay, He isn’t afraid of them. So, lean in towards Him with courage to ask Him to reveal to you how much He loves you.

His perfect love will cast out the fear in your heart. It’s the only way to dispel fear. Fear loses its grip as God’s faithful love grips your heart.

The Season of Winter

 

Winter is a hard season, one filled with bitter winds, slushy roads, sliding and slipping into ditches.  But it's also filled with glorious sunshine, crunchy sound beneath the boots, crisp and rejuvenating air, sledding down a hill, maybe even a snow machine ride.  

Wooded areas become exposed as trees give way to bare branches.  Things that were hidden as trees were filled with leaves and fruit can now be seen - that barn, branches laced with the sun's radiant glory.  

Life is now dormant, laying beneath the cold earth that may be covered with snow.  Life takes on a new role as roots go down deeper and the sap is being renewed for the season that is to come.

Winter is a time for rest and replenishing.  It's a time for quiet life to be within, not only in nature but also in our own heart and mind.

When the harsh winds of rejection, loss of a loved one, job, or friendship blow; it's easy to forget the 'sunshine and warmth'.  Our winters are a time to go deeper with Jesus and to put our roots further into His presence.  Letting the warmth of the Son fill our souls and lace our lives with His glory.

Winter is remembering who we really are without the signs of life and productivity.  For the tree as it stands tall, bare, and exposed is really all that it is, for without what's within there would be no visible life of fruit and leaves in the coming season.

We are completely loved and whole because we are the son or daughter of Jesus.  We are His beloved.  We are redeemed.  And no amount of doing, productivity, or lack thereof will alter that truth.  Our life is within, the hope and love of Jesus is the sap that keeps us.

Life within, where quiet growth may happen, is the truest of springs and the life that matters most.